Mourning HD

I'm sitting here now, with your words in my head;
Echoing and screaming and glowing with pain.
I feel alone and miserable, nothing more than nothing.
I think that you should share my hurting,
Because it was you, after all, who caused it.
Outside it is raining. I don't know why.
How can it rain when I am feeling as I am?
Nothing should happen, nothing should change,
Because I see nothing; because I am nothing.
The earth is cleansed, but why?

Butterflies should stop flying and squirrels should stop climbing.
Since you are gone, my life before.
And all its components.
But still, without you there is rain.
I don't know why.
The "how" of it eludes me; the where is lost.
Flowers seem to be growing, even though it is winter.
But then, maybe it isn't winter.
It could be spring, and flowers could be dead.
Without you, Or baffled; I know nothing, now.
You see, you are gone, but it's still raining.
Tomorrow it may be sunning,
And the day after it may be fogging.
I don't know.
But even though you still crouch in my heart,
   saying "This was me,"
Everywhere else the lack of you is a loud silence.
And still, there is rain. I don't know why.

Andrea Sykes
July, 2000

Slaying The Dragon Poetry